Showing posts with label kindness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kindness. Show all posts

Saturday, May 29, 2021

There's Been a Shooting at Ross Park Mall

 It came like a wave...

I was just telling Shelley this morning about the time I almost drowned, so maybe that's why the analogy is fresh in my mind. I was 23, it was my second time at the beach, and I had gotten farther out than the first wave. I turned to face the shore, raising my arms triumphantly, when it hit me from behind, pulling me under. I can't swim. It was turbulent, and as the water was rushing inside my surprised mouth and I kept seeing the sun flashing red and yellow amidst the salty blue, a hand pulled me to shore, where I coughed up some water and was fine overall. 

It was scary. 

It was a lot. 

It wasn't this. 

We had a couple things planned for today, all of which had gotten cancelled due to the rain, so we decided to go to Ross Park Mall to pick up my Tiffany necklace and bracelet from their cleaning. We figured we'd stop at Home Goods and grab a trifle dish for a dessert I was going to make and then head home. 

When we pulled into the mall lot, we were surprised at how many cars were there-- the mall was packed. I almost left my coat and phone in the car, but decided to bring it in case it was raining when we left. I noted that we parked in row 35, outside of Macy's, so we wouldn't lose our car. 

It was kind of nice to be out and have a little day date, so we decided to browse some stores, window shop at some of the "yeah, sure" priced stores, and I found the softest pullover at Eddie Bauer and decided if I still wanted it after we grabbed what we needed, I would come back for it. We laughed and took pictures and had fun. We stopped in the Vans store to check out their Pride collection. I got a three pack of no-show Pride socks plus a t-shirt and a couple other pairs, and Shelley got some crew socks. I impulse bought a pack of stickers for my guitar case. We chatted to the sweet girl behind the counter about whether or not Pittsburgh was going to host a parade this year. 

We left the Vans store and at 4:31 I texted my sister that we got Vans Pride socks and I felt very complete. I sent this as Shelley was looking at spices in this store dedicated pretty much exclusively to them, and I noted how calming it smelled in there. 

We walked out of the spice store and passed the Pandora store. I commented on how much I hated those stupid bracelets, and Shelley made some silly joke about Pandora's box. I was just about to say we should go in the Swarovski store because it's always sort of fun in there, and we heard some yells echo through the mall. 

I turned to see what was going on, imagining there were some people maybe fighting or causing a ruckus, and I saw a small black woman with glasses running down the escalator with some sort of hysterical sound between a laugh and a scream bubbling out of her. Before I could really process what was going on, I realized more people were running down both sides of the escalators, and then others began. It came like a wave, unexpected and powerful, and right towards us. 

Shelley grabbed my hand and said "run" and we began running. Shelley thought we were going to get trampled by this sea of people, and everyone sort of stopped and looked. I made eye contact with a tall white man who looked perplexed and then horrified as he scooped up his young daughter and began running. 

Shelley and I held hands as we ran, still not certain what the hell was happening. As we rounded the bend to the right, we heard the first gunshot. Shelley's eyes were huge and her mouth was open, and I know mine was mirroring that. We let go and began running as fast as we could and heard a second shot. My legs were tingling and I know adrenaline is the only thing that got me out of there. We were scanning to make sure we were near each other and trying to find an exit, and found the employee exit and went running through it with some other people. 

As we passed down that hallway, two security guards were standing there, slack jawed and probably confused, and I yelled "Something's going down out there! Do something!" and we ran out the door. Later we learned about 8 or 9 shots were fired in the mall, but Shelley and I ran so fast we were outside before we heard the third. 

When we got to the parking lot, a mom and daughter who exited with us asked a couple for a ride around to their car outside Macy's. People began to slow down, but I said I wanted to cross the street and get as far from the mall as possible. We had no idea where the shooter was or if there were multiples, so we passed a baseball field and heard people running and yelling. We ran past the baseball field where some girls hid in a dugout and slid through someone's muddy yard marked "Private Property" and into the cul-de-sac of a new housing development, where we hid behind a dumpster to try and regroup. Within 20 minutes of this happening we heard tons of sirens. They're still ringing in our ears as I write this five hours later. 

A couple moms (sisters) and their daughters followed our footprints and asked if we needed help. A woman came out of her house with her dog and wondered why we all were traipsing through her yard-- she had no idea there was a shooting basically just beyond her backyard. 

A car passed by a few times-- we later learned it was an undercover car, but thought it could've been another shooter. Only now, as I find out that 6 shooters were involved, do I realize we were wise rather than paranoid to keep moving and keep hiding. We walked along a road and stood near a driveway when it began to register what had happened, and we embraced and tried to calm down. A truck circled around to see if we were okay, and we assured them we were fine. The family we saw earlier squeezed into an SUV and offered us a ride, which we thanked them for but denied. The mall was on lockdown, so we couldn't get to poor Arlandria (my car) and had to leave her in the parking lot. 

We were still uncomfortable on the road, and crossed the four way street to a driveway where the garage door was open, and Shelley thought we could ask them for help. I saw a wooded area across the street and suggested we go there, so we did. We stood in this ditch behind some trees and rock piles and kept vigil, waiting for my mum to come and get us, which was no small feat due to the distance and the amount of traffic, the cops, and the SWAT team. 

I noticed a place under the hillside where we were that looked almost like a beaver dam, and suggested that IF something were to happen, we hide under there. I didn't think we would need it. 

After about an hour and a half of popping down like a meerkat any time a car passed, we heard some popping sounds. We were a little uncertain if we were just being jumpy-- for example, a neighboring house was drilling something and we both jumped to the ground. But this was about 8 bangs. Then it sounded closer, and happened again. We heard a man's voice on a nearby porch say "There are gunshots over the hill right there!" and a sliding glass door slam shut. 

Shelley and I began clambering down the hillside to this ravine-type opening, but then we heard the 8-bang sound twice more and then tires squealing and decided to try our luck with the house on the top of the other side. After a lot of sliding and climbing, we made it up and saw a face in the glass door, on the phone and staring. We waved our arms and screamed for help, and the woman went away but a man came and slid the door open and told us to come on in-- we had to bend his fence to get there and stumbled into his house. I couldn't stop shaking standing there, listening to the situation unfolding on the news. 

Shelley was on the phone with my mum trying to coordinate where to pick us up, and the man told me he thought we were the shooter at first and grabbed his son's bow & arrow and was about to let the dog loose-- a massive Italian bull mastiff. Then he saw our faces and realized we needed help. 

Once my mum picked us up and we made it to her house, the three of us sat watching the news. The suspects were apprehended by a bunch of police near Macy's, and it was sort of surreal to be sitting on my mother's couch clutching a homemade cocoa (Lupin was right: chocolate helps) and seeing my car in the parking lot as they panned out to rows 35 & 36. 

Then an update comes through that there was a suspect in the woods shooting at cops basically a block over from where we were hiding-- so that was what we heard, and it was smart to run. 

I thank God for keeping us safe and that we work well as a team and under pressure. I'm thankful for Shelley. I'm thankful for the kind people, and for the souls who let us take refuge in their home. I'm thankful I wore my checkerboard Vans today-- now covered in mud, like everything else we had on today. But we are okay. 

Sunday, September 24, 2017

28 Things I've Learned

My birthday was nearly two weeks ago, and in the midst of candles and balloons and a giant fruit basket and my favorite dinner ever (chicken penne gorgonzola-- thanks Mum!), I was feeling very reflective, as one does during birthdays. As such, I decided to write a post about things I've learned over the course of my life so far. Twenty-eight things, to be exact-- things that, whether good or bad, have shaped me.

1) Be kind-- it is the simplest gift you can give, both to yourself and to others.

2) Be thankful for what you have-- no matter how bad things seem, it could always be much, much worse.

3) Music is good for the soul. It elates you when you're already happy, it's cathartic when you need a good cry, and playing music/singing makes me more overjoyed than I could explain.

4) This world is a beautiful place-- take care of it. It's really not hard to throw away trash or make an effort to conserve a little bit.

5) Reading is the window to the world. You may not be able to afford to travel, but by opening a book and immersing yourself in its pages, you'll still see the world.

6) Sarcasm is a way of life.

7) I still hate coffee...and mashed potatoes.

8) I haven't found a better substitute for deep thinking than a long run outdoors.

9) Not everyone is going to like you, and that's okay. The people who do are the ones who matter.

10) I used to think changing the world had to be BIG and all at once. Now I see that we can all change our small corner of the world, a bit at a time, and if we try, it can make a difference.

11) Writing is my favorite form of self-expression, followed closely by art and music.

12) You're never as broken as you seem, and the people who matter are the ones who carry you through murky waters.

13) Taking time for yourself is so important, even if it's only a few moments a day, or if you're rocking out to music while you're drying your hair and singing into your hairbrush.

14) No one is ever that busy-- take some time to put down your phone, unplug, and just be. 

15) My sister gets me in a way no one else ever has-- having a solid relationship with someone who has known you your entire life is so, so important.

16) My mum is everything I want to be.

17) Take good care of yourself-- wash your face, wear sunscreen, floss... you only get one body.

18) Drink water, all day, every day.

19) God is so incredibly good-- take time to appreciate all He has given you.

20) Teaching is an important profession-- it's not just English or math or social studies. You have access to the secret lives of 130 kids at a time, and in addition to imparting knowledge on them in a basic sense, you also get to help mold them into decent human beings with a respect for one another and the world around them. It's pretty cool.

21) True, unconditional, soulmates-level love is real. I've witnessed it, and I've experienced it.

22) Compromise is essential in any type of relationship-- it's essential to listen to one another.

23) If I didn't have Shelley/my mum over the course of my life to provide cooked meals, I would just eat cereal/salads forever. I despise cooking.

24) You control who is and who isn't a part of your life. Eliminate negativity. It doesn't matter if someone has been in your life for 10 years or is related to you or anything else-- if you are unhappy, you can change that. Furthermore, there are friends and family members worth holding on to. Appreciate them and make sure they know.

25) I spent nearly 12 years working in the service industry, and 7 of those years were at the same place. When you go out to eat, just sit in the booth you're given-- you aren't moving in, it's an hour meal. Be considerate-- you are going out to be served food, not to treat people like they are your servants. And if you are going out, tip. Oh, and no speakerphone in public-- no one wants to hear your conversations. If you don't know how to be respectful and kind, just stay home, please.

26) Do one nice thing every single day-- even if it is as simple as paying a compliment or holding a door. A smile makes a world of difference.

27) I've always marched to the beat of my own drum, but when I was younger I had moments when I wished I wasn't QUITE so original. Being unique is awesome-- don't ever change or compromise who you are to fit a societal mold. You are wonderfully, fearfully made. BE YOURSELF.

28) Life is beautiful, but it is also brief. Being in shape or on time or the most popular person on social media is not as important as being happy and enjoying the ride. Cake is good. Buy the book or the shirt. Go on the trip. Cliche or not, you'll always regret not experiencing something wonderful over skipping out so you could work out or play around on Snapchat.

Heads Carolina, Tails California

 If you could live anywhere, where would it be? I’ve asked that question a lot lately, both to my family and myself.  I never thought I’d st...