It's been a year. One year of Zoom calls and social distancing and wearing masks. One year without eating in a restaurant. One year since I've seen most people. One year of trying to be creative with date nights and parties. A twice-postponed wedding. One year of fear and anxiety and shock and disappointment.
I've been using the One Second Every Day app on my phone since the start of 2020. Looking at the year in review video, you can see exactly when things went down: my photos went from a mix of random, everyday things like Zorro and a fire alongside taking Trent to Disney on Ice (February 29), walking around the Strip District with Shelley (March 8), to suddenly unnerving moments.
We went to the movies on March 10 because Tuesday = $5 movies, and while sitting in a theater full of coughing people, I began to feel uneasy. Those feelings were confirmed when we went to Sam's Club, where pallets are stacked ceiling high with supplies, and it was nearly empty-- no toilet paper, nothing in the freezers, three cases of water. Our final trivia night with Ben & Katelyn (March 11), where the prizes went from cool things like free growlers to toilet paper, as a joke... or not. Our food tasting for our wedding (March 12) where everyone sat distanced, and when we prepared to leave, Shelley shared that schools were closing and I watched the color drain from my mother's face.
I went with my mum after work on Friday, March 13 to pick up Pippin, her baby bunny that Shelley, Elizabeth, and I coerced her into getting. Pip was in a box on the porch and we were instructed to leave the money under the mat. When my mum stopped at the store to get food for Shelley's birthday dinner, I sat in the car with Pip. The lot was completely full, and it took quite some time. I looked up from time to time as sunset became twilight and finally my mum emerged with a few bags. I've known her long enough (my entire life) to know her emotions, and I could immediately tell she was trying not to cry. When she opened the door, she was shaking. People were fighting right in front of her, she said. Pushing and shoving and screaming and grabbing things-- she managed to get the last bit of beef and a box of pasta and some stewed tomatoes and a can of paste-- things to make spaghetti and meatballs per Shelley's request.
The following day, we went to Mum's to have cherry pie and pasta for Shelley and worried about what was to come. The news alerts were coming in constantly. The day after, March 15, I went to work with Shelley to prep a big catering order she had. The following day, Shelley's actual birthday, the world shut down. From there, every photo for a few weeks was just Zorro & Ru, plants, coloring pages, baking...
I lost myself for a minute there.
I think we all did.
But from that time came hope and resilience. We learned to adjust to life with masks and social distancing (well, most of us did) to care for ourselves and others. It was an act of selflessness and love and sacrifice. Holidays were celebrated creatively. Trips were cancelled. We stayed home because we cared, and learned how to foster our relationships in different ways. We SAW ourselves, and each other, possibly for the first time, because we were all stripped to the rawest essence of who we are, and forced to awaken to the reckoning that awaited in the form of things like BLM and the election. We adapted and overcame and persisted.
Now, there is hope on the horizon. There is a chance for us to come out of this-- not to "go back to normal" (because what even IS normal, anyway?!) but to take what we've learned about ourselves and each other and carry it with us always, to become better versions of the empty, broken husks of humanity we were before. Now we know what it is to rest. Now we know what it is to talk to one another with the empathy and compassion of a shared experience and apply that to ALL aspects of life beyond a worldwide pandemic.
Initially, I wanted this to be more of a list of the things that have gotten me through this past year, as sort of a time capsule for me to look back on. I am going to include that here, and encourage you to peruse it if you're looking for something fresh to get you through the next few months. We're not there yet, but we're close. Stay strong, live well, and spread the love.
Things That Have Gotten Me Through 2020 (and 2021 so far):
- dining al fresco at home
- plants (so many)
- coloring
- the wild bunny in our yard we dubbed Chester
- Nintendo Switch
- virtual tours
- puzzles
- "Schitt's Creek"
- Disney+
- watching "Seinfeld" from episode 1 of the first season all the way through
- "Gilmore Girls"
- celebrating our would-be wedding weekend at Trough Creek with a slice of rainbow cake
- hiking and all the programs at Raccoon
- learning to skateboard
- learning to paddleboard
- baking ultimate chocolate cake
- our backyard oasis
- cheese pizza
- riding bikes
- celestial events
- online shopping (secondhand) -- as much as I hate to admit this, at least it is sustainable!
- seeing the good in each day with a post and caption on Instagram (as basic as it sounds)
- gratitude journaling
- praying without ceasing-- the brightest joys, the deepest gratitudes, and the greatest fears
- "Life as We Knew It" series
- Harry Potter series
- "Where the Crawdads Sing"
- "Tooth & Claw"
- "Is This Anything?" made me laugh so much
- "We'll Always Have Paris" whisked me off on travels
- the release of "Midnight Sun"
- the brief moments I felt like cooking dinner (thanks, Hello Fresh!)
- seeing masks as a fashion opportunity instead of a fashion hindrance
- video messaging my sister
- discovering essential oils
- my mum and our phone calls
- fire side chats and camping with our little quarantine bubble
- Zoom game nights with friends
- brightening up our bedroom
- creating new traditions in the midst of the old
- Zorro & Ru
- music
- Vogue magazine
- The New Yorker-- especially the cartoons (they have their own Instagram page)
- stepping up my clothing game when I leave the house (why not get dressed up to get groceries?)
- Hocking Hills for NYE with fireworks, champagne, kisses, and a wish for a happy & healthy 2021
- Shelley, always.
