Hosting a Gathering in a Small Space

I used artificial greenery for the centerpiece.

From the time I was a small child, I remember holidays as bright, beautiful, warm, and somewhat hectic. There are so many traditions I associate with this time of year, and even now, as an adult, I still get nostalgic pulling out decorations and seeing strings of lights. One of my fondest memories is the way everyone always gathered together. As the years have passed, the faces around the table have changed-- some passing away, some new ones being added as we've grown up, gotten engaged, or had children who will eventually be the ones at the kids table instead of us.

Both sides of my family are enormous, but that never stopped us from cramming around tables together to share food, conversation, and laughter. I picture my Aunt Jani's dining room on Thanksgiving or Christmas day, jammed with an eclectic assortment of chairs and these gorgeous place settings, while our beloved Peg shares her thoughts on everything from traveling the Amalfi Coast for "some R&R" to Rolling Stone magazine. I think of Christmas Eves at Nunny and Puppa's house, two long tables shoved in the basement, the loud din of my grandparents, their siblings, their five children and significant others, and their 16 grandchildren.

The common ground was the love-- it never mattered in either place how crowded it was-- although it was definitely hard to navigate around all the chairs! It was about all of the people they most cared about gathered in one space to share a meal together.

I was reading something recently in The New Yorker about how Friendsgiving is a saving grace for many people-- an occasion for us to gather with our chosen family, the ones who are there for us not through blood but by choice. I am blessed with so many friends like that, and family as well.

This year, Shelley said she wanted to host Thanksgiving. Everyone had plans, but my mum, sister, and I have always done something we affectionately referred to as "Part Two". We usually went out for Thanksgiving to my aunt's house, but Part Two was a chance for us to stay in our pajamas, decorate for Christmas, eat as much as we wanted, and have leftovers for the week. I can still remember sneaking in to the fridge to dip cold turkey into cold gravy (if you haven't tried it, you should).

We had a small group of family and some close neighbor friends over for Part Two this year-- in spite of the fact that our home is incredibly compact, we managed to get a dozen people in here. Perhaps, dear reader, you have wanted to have a gathering but worried your space was too small and it wouldn't go well. Now that we have successfully executed such a dinner, I'm sharing some of the things that worked for us.

1) Possibly the most important thing in any gathering is food. Have you ever noticed how you may be on the fence about something until you hear that pizza will be provided (maybe that's just me?)? Shelley is a fantastic cook, and she worked for a couple weeks to plan a menu all from scratch-- a brined turkey, brussels sprouts that one person even said were enough to make her like them, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, green bean almondine, rolls, a vegetable tray, crab dip, pumpkin cheesecake, and stuffing. My mum brought a pumpkin pie and a cherry pie as well. People are happy to be well-fed, and that coupled with the wine everyone brought was enough to keep us all merry.

2) Music is essential. It's always been a massive part of my life, so I crafted a playlist of chill songs that spanned like 7.5 hours. I didn't want to induce any turkey comas, but I also wanted it to be a good vibe-- subtly soaring in the background of the constant conversation.

3) I enjoy decorating-- particularly at this time of year, which really gives me a chance to shine. We used paper plates and napkins from the Dollar Tree with some cute plastic forks. The reason behind this was two-fold-- it's a little more comfortable to use something you aren't afraid of breaking, and you want to enjoy your time with your guests without stopping to wash a mountain of dishes.

My tablescape

I used a mix of candles and greenery (real and artificial) to add depth to the tablescape and make it worthy of Shelley's meal, plus give a boho-hygge feel (I'm not sure if that's a thing or not outside of my daily life, but now it is). I hand-lettered name tags for everyone and used some gold-threaded twine to tie them to sprigs of rosemary, which smelled amazing and gave a nice personal touch. There is something special to me about crafting a space that shows love for each person sitting around the table.

Name tags and greenery add a personal touch

Candles give off a serious glow

4) Keep it casual so guests feel comfortable. I have been places before where I was afraid to breath because I didn't want to wreck anything-- it was almost TOO nice. Even though the food was snazzy and the place settings looked nice, they were still plates that came in a pack of 18 for a dollar. Giving it a laid-back feel made it slightly less bizarre and "are those the chairs you take camping?", I think, that everyone was sitting in a hilariously eclectic assortment of chairs that could only be described as "A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving".

Camp chairs, desk chairs, dining room chairs-- we had them all. 

These are things that definitely added to our successful gathering. It didn't matter what a small space we had because the people who came were awesome, and there is a mutual love that harkens back to those nights sitting around the table with my family for all of those years.